My turn: Direct deposit denies desire to stay set in ways

I often describe myself to others as an "old man."Of course, I'm not particularly old. I just celebrated my 22nd birthday, and my body only aches after long runs or grueling hikes. I stay up well past an old man's bedtime, thanks in large part to the publication you're holding.

I only call people "hooligans" and "yahoos" in jest, though I've noticed that lately I've been referring to people as "jokers" in all seriousness.

I don't tend to complain about "young people and their skateboards and their loud music and their drugs" and I promise I only use the word "britches" to get laughs and when people call me out for being crabby about things.

But that's precisely where the old man label comes from: I do tend to be a bit crotchety.

There are worse things in the world than being set in your ways, and I wouldn't say I'm closed-minded, per se.

I, like most old men, simply enjoy having things my way.

Sometimes it's unrealistic.

Yes, I do have to figure out how to use a GPS and no, the buttons aren't too small once you get used to them.

Yes, buying music digitally is cheaper and easier and no, I don't need to own the physical CD just because of its case and artwork.

And yes, I should really learn to accept direct deposit as a better way of receiving my paychecks and managing my finances.

But doggone it I just don't want to!

In recent weeks, I've been under incredible pressure from Eastern to set up a direct deposit account for my checks, and I get it, really:

Direct deposit is simpler for both the university and myself. It removes the middleman, saves the university from having to print and deliver a check and saves me from having to trudge to the bank between 8 a.m. and 4 p.m. to cash it.

It means my money instantly appears in my account when it's released. It's more environmentally friendly because it's a paper-less system, and it costs me no money and very little time and effort to make the switch.

Everybody wins with direct deposit, but I don't care, because here comes "old man Steve" to "give them a piece of my mind:"

"In my day, people used to cash paychecks and physically hold the money they earned before deciding what to do with it.

Sure, it was inconvenient to have to run to the bank to cash the checks, but back then we weren't all in such a damned hurry all the time.

If it meant we could hold the money and actually feel like we earned something that week, we were happy to do it.

Nowadays all you hoodlums with your credit cards just watch the numbers get bigger on you computer screens and your "e-phones," or whatever they're called. You run those cards through the machines and don't think twice about what you're actually doing.

Money goes from being a matter or dollars and cents to a matter of meaningless numbers on a screen.

In my day, when you blew half your paycheck on a color TV or some fancy gadget that tells you whether it's raining outside or not, you handed the sales clerk a stack of cash and probably reconsidered it somewhere along the way.

You had to think about whether you'd need that money for something more important, like feeding your family during the next depression or paying taxes for paved roads.

We didn't just run out and buy things, you know, and when we did, we felt the sting of spending money.

Maybe that's why everyone's in so much debt these days."

I received an e-mail a couple of weeks ago informing me that if I didn't sign up for direct deposit before the next pay period, Eastern would issue me a debit card from a bank of their choosing and force my hand.

They're taking the paperless payment thing seriously, and with it, taking away my preferred option for payments.

By forcing me into direct deposit, Eastern is no longer allowing me to inconvenience myself the way I see fit.

They're not giving me the satisfaction of staying set in my ways, and nothing makes an old man unreasonably cantankerous quite like that.