By Tyler Gilliam

When I walked into my local cinema, my hopes for Doomsday dwindled. By the end of the film I was pretty satisfied, but terribly confused. I’ll start at the beginning.First things first, Doomsday is not a zombie movie. Maybe I’m the only one who thought that, and maybe I’m the only one who really wanted to see a zombie movie, but that’s really why I went to see the film. So, no zombies, but we do get a killer virus.

We start at the border between England and Scotland. A flesh-eating virus, called the “reaper,” has swept across Scotland.

In order to contain the virus the government built a 30-foot wall around Scotland, leaving those who are infected or exposed to die on the other side.

When an armed guard shoots an infected man, the enraged crowd storms the gate. Soldiers fire on the crowd, hitting a young girl and taking out her right eye. The girl, Eden Sinclair, is sent out of Scotland on a military helicopter as the doors are closed and welded shut.

Fast-forward 25 years later. The virus has reemerged, this time in London. Thank God we live in America, eh?

The British government is desperate for a cure and has discovered survivors living in Scotland. So, they send an elite team into “no man’s land,” lead by Eden Sinclair, who is played by Rhona Mitra (Boston Legal, Nip/Tuck). The team is looking for a doctor named Kane who presumably discovered the cure to the reaper virus.

Equipped with her removable camera eye, Eden heads into a post apocalyptic, Mad Max-esque world beyond the wall. The survivors there have turned into bloodthirsty, cannibalistic heathens who are eager to kill, and eat, the intruders. Most of the team is killed, but Sinclair escapes with Sergeant Norton, played by Adrian Lester (The Day After Tomorrow) and Kane’s daughter Cally, played by MyAnna Burning).

The bunch travels from the post-apocalyptic Mad Max world to a more Arthurian Scotland, which boasts knights, castles and even a gift shop.

They find Kane, played by Malcom McDowell (Halloween) and find out that there is no vaccine, the survivors were simply those immune to the reaper virus.

Sinclair escapes Kane, and steals a new old-stock Bentley. Then we get a car chase back through the thunder dome, and to the helicopter waiting to pick up the vaccine. Sinclair sends Cally and returns to the city with the head of their leader, and takes over.

Did you happen to follow any of my synopsis? The movie isn’t much easier to keep up with.

I really can’t say it was good or bad, but it was one of the oddest films I’ve ever seen.

I don’t care much for its director, Neil Marshall (have you seen The Descent?), and this movie really didn’t do anything to redeem him.

Of course, the Scottish scenery was beautiful. It’s basically Kentucky, but without the trailers.

The movie was very gory, but tastefully so. I don’t have the stomach for movies like Saw or Hostel, but this one had all the gore without making me sick.

I also enjoyed Rhona Mitra; I always do. She fits the bill of the Resident Evil-type chick hero.

I could see her driving through a high-speed shootout. She was completely believable and made this oddball film worthwhile.

I wouldn’t write this movie off, but don’t go in with great expectations, or any expectation really.